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Dharma is a Beautiful Word
To do Zen practice is to do the activity of the universe. If one becomes the activity of the universe, thinking along the lines, "if I do Zen practice will it be good for me?" becomes irrelevant.
There is a point I have heard, which to use my own words goes something like, "wearing clothes, talking, and driving a car does not necessarily make one a human being." Many children's books feature animals doing just that.
There is something animalistic about the unconditional belief in the "I am" self, which is so prevalent. "No Self" is the foundation of Buddhism. Therefore, taking the Buddhist path in the world today necessitates manifesting a self which has no self as its' foundation.
"Dharma" has always been a very soothing word for me. I have a very specific feeling about the word, which is more satisfying then the definitions I have heard. The closest English translation might be Nature, but it would have to be a Nature where there is nothing that is not Nature. Maybe the entire universe is an accurate description. However, it would have to be the universe that while including a subject/object point of view, is also completely without subject and object.
Usually, doing Zazen fills me with a deep appreciation of the Dharma. All the trials and tribulations which can take up a whole day become insignificant in light of the marvelous working of the Dharma. I also know Zazen which feels pointless, boring, and painful. When one does Zazen in a monastic training context, both points of view become irrelevant because no matter how positive or negative an experience one has just had, the greater reality is that one must rise to hit the cushion anew. Frankly, I find my secular life to be much more monotonous then my monastic life was. However, as I was taught when life is a grind and one becomes that grind, that grind will disappear.
with Gassho,
Tokuju Genshu, Osho
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